Monday, August 14, 2017

My Road Trip

I just got back from a whirlwind tour of Eastern Canada. I've never been that far east in Canada, so I figured I'd at least touch base on one or two provinces I've never been to.

Here's my report:

New Brunswick

Nice place, but why go there when you can have the same experience right here in Ontario. Oh, I forgot about the illusion at the magnetic hill in Moncton. Six bucks to sit in your car while it rolls backwards. Hardly worth the drive from Ontario.

Nova Scotia

People told me to make sure I visited the Cabot Trail. So I did the entire circuit. It's magnificent.

One thing I didn't like about the Cabot Trail was the price of smokes. $19.57 for a pack of Du Maurier. One does not need to know a thing about Nova Scotia politics other than the price of a pack of smokes. It shows the degree to which a government is committed to imposing non-diversity upon its inhabitants.

Quebec

The things that I like about Quebec are that they sell beer in the stores, and they take Canadian money at par. The fact that the road signs are all in French is very dangerous for people who don't speak French. It's also dangerous for the people who do speak French when they are T-boned by GPS-addled Anglophones. Is this French chauvinism really worth the price?

I did notice a few English signs though. Like the ones that said, "Restaurant."

I was in some town on the St. Lawrence looking for something to eat. Of course they had a McDonald's, but I am sick of that. Then I spotted this restaurant, called "Mike's." I derived a sense of comfort from that, so I went in.

There were a few people waiting to be seated so I got in line and picked up a menu.

The whole thing was in French. What was I supposed to do, just randomly pick an item and point to it?

But the decisive factor for me was not the incomprehensible menu. There was one item, I think it was "Manger de la marde et les Pomme de Brule avec Poisson." The description was about as comprehensible as the rest of the items on the menu, but what really turned me off was the price. $39 dollars or something. And you have to add tax and tip on top of that.

So I went to another place where there was one item I could understand. It was, "Pepperoni Pizza." I ordered that plus a Coke. It was pretty good but at $12 for a pizza smaller than a sidewalk pizza? Even at par that's pricey.

Overall

Without my usual access to the Internet, I was left with little more than fake news reports from Canadian corporate media and the CBC on the car radio. Prominent amongst the reports were stories about a bunch of white nationalists, KKK supporters, and Nazis going berserk in Charlottesville, Virginia. I couldn't wait to get home to check on my alternate media sources to find out what the real story was.

1 comment:

  1. Glad you made it home safely and didn't get in an accident in Quebec. I hated Quebec...I remember hitch hiking there in 1972 with a traveling hash smoking friend. We were stuck outside Rivere du Loup (sorry about the spelling) for 48 hours. We were heading back into town to catch a bus (which we really couldn't afford) when a traveling sales fag picked us up...thank god for fags.

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